Last week I received some custom artwork from Modern Bird Studios.

They took this…

And created this…

I love it.

I think they are amazing and talented and beautiful and all things lovely.  Look what else they created…

Each piece they create is an original and is made with a combination of digital, hand, and painting processes. Check out more amazing creations in their gallery.

The lovely folks at Modern Bird Studios are giving away a 12″ x 12″ custom piece (valued at $212) to one of my readers. You all are so special.  :)

To enter the giveaway, simply leave a comment. For extra entries, please follow the fabulous Modern Bird Studios on Twitter and/or Facebook, Tweet this giveaway, or even write a post directing people to the it.  Everything you do gives you another entry (please leave a separate comment for each thing you do). The contest is open to the lower 48 only (all of the U.S. except for Alaska and Hawaii), and you are not eligible if you have already won a giveaway from Modern Bird Studios. The contest is open until Friday, July 16th at 8pm EST. I will announce the winner on Saturday, July 17th.

If you’re so inclined, you can hop on over to Modern Bird Studios and get yourself a one-of-a-kind piece for 15% off with code: WARMCUP (this discount will expire one week after the contest ends). Anyone who uses the coupon code is still eligible to be entered to win!

Good “luck!”

P.S.  I would show you a picture of the artwork hanging in my house, but we are currently renovating so it won’t be up until the paint is dried!  Remind me and I’ll show you a pic when it’s finished.  ;)

I’ve been going about this all wrong.

My heart doesn’t translate over wires and so I know I must learn a new way.  Loving first, living convictions, speaking gentle.

Not pushing.

Not pulling.

Listening, wrapping arms, lifting up.

Clinging to Him, trusting His Word, figuring out the ‘how’ of the tongue.

Face to the floor.

Today’s post is from Jasmine Baucham….

The other day, a really sweet lady from my church called to tell me that she wanted to give away a huge box of books that she thought I would especially love. They are never opened, second editions of a Britannica Great Books set which include Locke, Hume, Tolstoy, Descartes, Goethe, Smith, Chaucer, Darwin, Bacon, Augustine, Rousseau, and Montesquieu, among so many others. To say I was thrilled would be the understatement of the year.

When I tell people that I am planning on living at home and serving my family until (if the Lord wills) I become a helpmeet and homemaker in my own home someday, they tend to assume that I’m your average Susie Homemaker, a June Cleaver/ rip-off who enjoys dancing around her kitchen in pumps and swing dresses while she cooks gourmet dinners with ingredients from her garden, trying to hurry through dinner so she can get back to her French needlepoint.

I’m not knocking gourmet meals or gardens here, but such a monolithic understanding of the word “homemaker”  or the phrase “stay-at-home daughter” have given us women a bad rap –especially women like me, who tend to be much more adept at working as their dad’s research assistants than putting craft tutorials online.

I love that there are artsy, crafty home-lovers out there… and I love that there are wordy, bookish home-lovers out there; in the same way, I love that –should the Lord send me a husband –I fully expect him to need me for my mental powers as he needs me to care for the children. And, yes, although I realize that the term “barefoot and pregnant” is fighting words… I’ll let you throw the first punch while I fantasize about reading Orwell between laundry loads while my burgeoning baby belly blocks the sight of my bare feet from wistful eyes.

Hey, you’ve got your fantasy, and I’ve got mine!

Several weeks ago, I wrote an article for Ladies Against Feminism called A Dream Deferred –the feedback was mixed. For the most part, I had quite a few concerned readers bemoaning the fact that I had given up my desire to become a Ph.D. or a screenwriter all for the sake of serving my family –one email told me that I had “quashed” my dreams! On the other hand, though, folks seemed to understand just what I was trying to say: embracing a homeward calling wasn’t about beating out those “non-housewifey” aspects of my personality –it was about realizing that the Lord gave me the unique gifts, calling, and abilities he gave me, not as an excuse to run off helter-skelter with whatever aspirations I could think of… but to apply them within his design.

He made me a lover of books, ya’ll… and then he put me in a household that was full of them –not only that, but he gave me a dad who is constantly in need of a research assistant! Someday, he might give me a husband who needs one, too! But even if my husband’s a plumber who really has little use for Descartes, the Lord has also given me a passion for teaching… which I can apply to my own children (who will be reading Virgil by the time they’re four… you know, maybe).

Five years ago, I realized  that –more than the world needed another Pulitzer Prize winner or Academy Award hopeful… it needed a daughter willing to stay at home and serve her family; because the biggest unit being attacked in our culture isn’t the film world or the academic world (although both are under fire): it’s the family. And the family takes primary importance over those spheres because, like it or not, it is the cornerstone of society. Strong families = strong cultures. And individualistic aspirations tend to weaken a family. So I began to see my dreams in light of those truths….

And I threw out all of my literature books and took up knitting.

Actually, no. While I did learn to love the tasks that I used to put aside for those books of mine (it’s beautiful how that love grows when you’re doing something for the glory of God), I also learned that I could be an individual and a stay-at-home daughter at the same time.

Who knew?

Biblical womanhood doesn’t come in a box –I hear you. But calling women to embrace a homeward calling isn’t boxing them in: it’s pointing to the Word of God as our framework (Titus 2:3-5) and employing our gifts in biblical contexts. Paradigm has become an ugly word –but, truly, God’s Word should be the filter through which we evaluate our dreams, our goals, our aspirations… and our quirks.

I am a stay-at-home daughter. I believe that the Lord has called me to serve Him and my family in this way. I love home-management… and I love George Orwell. And my family needs both aspects of my personality to run this ship, just as I suspect my future household will as well. I have lost nothing in pursuit of a homeward focus –but I have gained accountability, community, discipleship, and blessings beyond measure by living here. More than that, I have gained the satisfaction of following God’s calling on my life.

If you’re afraid of losing your individuality by coming home… don’t be. All you have to lose is the presupposition that states that homemakers fit into a nice little box aside from every other kind of woman that there is. It just isn’t true. And I’m so glad.
-Jasmine

Jasmine is the oldest of Voddie and Bridget Baucham’s six children. She is a homeschool graduate who enjoys studying and writing about areas as varied as theology, philosophy, political science, art, film and culture. She is also an aspiring author who currently lives at home where she continues to assist her father in his research, is completing a degree in English literature, writing a book based on her blog, Joyfully at Home, and is blessed to assist her mother with the care of her younger siblings.

Oh, why bother talking about this anymore?

Why does it matter if a woman chooses to be a homemaker or a career woman?

I submit, there are many, many pressing needs in the world that seem to demand more a focus then something as divisive as exhorting women to be homemakers…yet…

Nestled in the heart of God is a foundation laid for women that makes so much sense.  And while His ideas often seem crazy, they are, none-the-less, His ideas.

So it is with a humble offering, I continue to speak on it.

Today, I’d like to peek behind the ink into the meaning…

οἰκουρός (oikourgos), a Greek word, found in Titus 2:5:

1. Working at home*
2. Watching or keeping the house, of a watch dog**

• The word oikourgos is a compound word made from oikos (a house; a dwelling) and ergon (work).*
• This compound word is not found anywhere else in scripture (so we can’t compare it)
• Used in other sources as speaking contemptuously of a man, staty-at-home, as opposed to one who goes forth to war**

If we look to God’s Word as the source of wisdom and authority and truth (2 Timothy3:16), we should be able to see that, according to Titus 2:5, a married woman with children is to be a keeper/worker at home.

However you flesh it out, the very basic principle is that women have a homeward calling.

Does this mean a woman/mother can’t work outside the home?  No, it doesn’t.

Does this mean a woman/mother can be a ‘career’ woman, working full-time outside the home? I don’t know.  I also do not know, in all realty, how a woman could give her days to a job and yet serve her family well, keeping the home, training her children, submitting first to her husband.

I know I’m not every woman, so I can’t speak for how everyone manages their household, but I do know how many thousands of moments of training are in a day, and I know that no one can train them and love them like me (not because I’m great, but because I’m their mommy).  No one else can tuck them into naps like I can.  No one else can greet them from their nap with my smile and hugs.  No one else can kiss the boo boo’s like me, and no one else can intervene during the many sibling conflicts and teach love like I can…because I’m their mommy and it’s my job to grow up those eternal souls and train them in the Lord.  I grew them in my body, and I nurtured them with my body.  They are not someone else’s to care for and train, they are mine, as gifts from a most gracious God, to be His.

I know life is messy.  I know some of you long to be home and some of you have to work.  We do what we have to do.  All for the glory of God, in His grace.

A Word on Grace

No Biblical Family?

*Strong’s Numbers http://strongsnumbers.com/greek/3626.htm

**Henry George Liddell, Robert Scott, A Greek-English Lexicon http://www.perseus.tufts.edu/hopper/text?doc=Perseus:text:1999.04.0057:entry%3D%2372383&redirect=true

a new thing…

The Cream on Top

Today’s Lady of Wisdom interview is with my Mother-in-Law, Susan, who is such a gracious, humble, lovely, godly woman who inspires me to persevere in my role as a woman, wife, and mother.  She may or may not have threatened to tackle me at one point in our relationship when I was just dating her son {ahem}.

SM: Why did you choose to be a stay-at-home mom?

Susan: My plan when Gary and I married was that I would continue to work when I had children, however, after I became a believer I was deeply convicted about staying at home with the children; I felt like someone had to be home taking care of them. I knew, even when I was a very young woman, that those little souls were the most important thing to me.  There is only so much time to invest into their lives, and I didn’t want to miss that.  It is not quality time but the quantity of time that we have with them.  I did do other things and use the giftings God gave me, such as counseling, teaching Sunday school, leading bible studies, and volunteering, but my main priority was my home.   It wasn’t perfect, and there was heartache, frustration, and even times of feeling inadequate. What kept me going was that I knew instinctively and from God’s Word were I should be.

SM: What kinds of things did you do to train your children in the Lord?

Susan: Both Gary and I felt very strongly about Deuteronomy 6, so our faith was an everyday, intentional occurrence. We also tried to teach our children about serving others by having them with us when we served.  We were consistent in church and being joined with other believers. We were intentional about sharing the gospel, and intentional about saying, “I’m sorry, I was wrong.” We also taught them to show grace towards others.  Another very important thing Gary and I did was we developed our own relationship with God through bible reading, study, memorization, and developing our marriage relationship. Developing the marriage relationship is so very important, not just for you and your husband, but because of the huge affect it has as on your children.

SM: What are some “tools” in your tool kit of parenting that have worked for you that you could pass on to younger moms?

• Schedules – Children need schedules/routine; they get security from it, discipline, and they are even happier.
• Curbing what you invite into your home – T.V., we weren’t into whatever was popular out there, we tried to bring in wholesome things into our lives.  Hold the line on things, even when you get a hard time.
• Share about purity in mind, heart, and body –hold the line with that as well. We taught our daughters that you can be attractive and beautiful without showing a lot.  It’s also very important that a father doesn’t put is daughters down or make them feel impure.
• Talk about sexual things with them in light of God’s Word
• Be most concerned for their salvation

SM: What would you do over if you could?

Susan: The biggest thing I wish I could do is having had a better handle on my emotions, my anger… I wish I could have curbed my temper more – I was harsh at times.  I went back and said I’m sorry, and prayed a lot about it, but I just lost it at times.  I hated that.

SM: Any advice for stay-at-home moms who feel like they’ve lost themselves as women or are just exhaused?

Susan: The things that kept me going and that I recommend are: a supportive husband, dates with your husband so you can be a wife (not just a mother), and stay in the Word (powerful) – God’s Word is what will help you to persevere.  I also think it is healthy to take time on your own as a refreshment (not as an escape).

SM: How did you make time for your husband when you were exhausted with little ones?

Susan:  I would take a nap.  I took power naps (even 20 minutes) and that would refresh me enough to have energy for my husband.  Also, I would set my mind on him. I purposefully made myself look nice – you have to be intentional or it doesn’t happen. You’re always going to be tired, but you have to take time to rest.

SM: What is the greatest thing you’ve learned in how to be a good wife?

Susan: The greatest thing I’ve learned is realizing the grace God has given me and being able to turn around and show grace towards my husband. Whatever I’ve accused him of, guess whose done it too?  Me.

Today’s post is linked up with the first ever Polished Cornerstones link-up on RaisingHomemakers.com.

Read more Lady of Wisdom interviews here.

Honored to have today’s post written by Jasmine Baucham (read more about her at the end of the article)…

There is no biblical family model.

In our day and age, a sentence like that comes off as something warm, fuzzy, and accepting –in a culture where diversity is next to godliness, a sentence like that takes the pressure off of blossoming Christian families –instead of encouraging them to delve into God’s Word for biblical principles, the phrase encourages them to go with the flow and to do what feels right… because there is no right answer –no one-size-fits all approach to family life. So heave a sigh of relief, ladies –the Bible doesn’t judge you, so your fellow Christians shouldn’t either.

Well, there ya go.

Except… rather than closing the door on a host of problems, this approach to family life opens a whole ‘nother can of worms. This past week, I’ve read that sentence from two extremely different points of view… from Christians advocating a non-judgmental approach to family decisions… to homosexual activists using the sordid family lives of the patriarchs to justify their monogamous lifestyles (http://www.newsweek.com/2008/12/05/our-mutual-joy.html).

See, that’s a problem for me, and not just because I have an axe to grind –I do not write this article from a position of perfection –not only do I not have a perfect marriage… I’m not even married! But, at twenty, someday, I’d certainly like to be married… and I think that the best time to hash out family issues is before I’ve walked the aisle… not afterwards. And so, armed with a legacy passed down from a dad who is passionate about the biblical family unit (and yes, I think there is one), and a mother who has worked with him to instill the desire for a biblically-structured family in their six children, this is a question that I want to dive into:

If there is a biblical family model, where can we find it?

The first thing we have to keep in mind is that narrative is not normative. So just because Hosea married a prostitute, Abraham had a concubine, or David and Solomon had a gaggle of wives does not mean that modern-day Christians should follow suit. Just because something is recorded in the Bible does not mean that it is commanded of us in the Bible. The only man we should strive to emulate in Scripture is Christ Jesus, and we ought only to emulate others insofar as they are walking in his ways.

But

what about the passages that are normative?

“Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body. “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.” Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” ~Eph. 5:22-6:4, ESV

I don’t know about you, but that looks like a lot of directives to me. In fact, if you add in the fact that Paul is hearkening back to Deuteronomy 6 in his passage about teaching and training children (Deuteronomy 6:4-9), and that, later on, he gives further instruction to wives in passages Titus 2:3-5 and 1 Peter 3:1-6, the argument that there is no biblical pattern for family life sounds… well… not of the spirit, but of the flesh (“I really don’t want to hear what you have to say about biblical family life… so there’s no such thing!”). Given that all Scripture is inspired by God, the words of Paul –a single man writing under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit –should hold a little more weight than, “Well… you should just do whatever works for you!” (2 Timothy 3:16-17)

Just as an aside here, I am not arguing that all families should look alike –there is incredible room for diversity and growth within the biblical pattern for family life (I know that phrase makes so many people cringe). But, as with so many other facets of our lives, the fact that we claim the love and serve the Lord with all that is within us should impact the way we do family (and the way we do church… and the way we do education… and the way we do government… but those are whole different cans of worms).

Marriage is carefully defined in Scripture –and families are given a pattern to follow in God’s Word. Now, where the Scripture does not speak, we ought to be silent –this is not about fettering families with extra-biblical rules or sending them on a guilt trip. What it is about, though, is understanding that, as believers we aren’t as free in our family choices as we’ve been led to believe we are –in fact, as slaves to Christ (Romans 6), the decisions we make as families (or, in my case, as young people who will someday be going in to families) are incredibly important. Too important to be cast aside with the very non-judgmental-sounding-but-very-dangerous in reality, “There is no biblical model for family life.”

As Christians modeling the Savior who died for us, and called to obey his commands (John 14:15), we ought not be so quick to silence His Word on the matter.

-Jasmine

Jasmine is the oldest of Voddie and Bridget Baucham’s six children. She is a homeschool graduate who enjoys studying and writing about areas as varied as theology, philosophy, political science, art, film and culture. She is also an aspiring author who currently lives at home where she continues to assist her father in his research, is completing a degree in English literature, writing a book based on her blog, Joyfully at Home, and is blessed to assist her mother with the care of her younger siblings.

Photo credit: A Family Bond

I love grace.

I am so thankful that when we are in Christ Jesus, we are no longer condemned.  I dance in grace and I desire to heap grace on others.

I also love truth and whole-heartedly want to seek it out. I have deep convictions based on the Word of God that I view as sufficient and authoritative.

I need to make two things very very very clear before proceeding with my ‘created woman’ series (I just made that name up right now, so it may change!).

1.) I fully understand that we live in a sin-saturated world where black and white doesn’t always fit and circumstances vary greatly.  Grace.

2.) I am not speaking for God when I communicate my convictions after studying God-breathed Words. I cling to His truth because I love Him and seek to obey Him. I’m so thankful for His gentleness and overwhelming grace.

3.) I am not judging my fellow sisters-in-Christ who fall differently on the issues than I do.  I will exhort and proclaim the Word of God to women, but I am not judging.  Speaking convictions does not equal a personal judgment from me towards others. *Edit* Everyone judges, whether they know it or not. I suppose I’m judging when I disagree? Either way, what I mean is that I don’t (or at least sincerely try not to) look down on my sisters.

4.) I do not believe that the roles of women are a salvation issue.  There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Romans 8:1

5.) Have I mentioned grace?  Love it, cling to it, desperate for it.

6.) I love the sneaker test and hope you will weigh all my words against scripture…I will do the same as you challenge me.

7.) We may ultimately disagree on issues.  That’s okay!  We can still love each other!

8.) In everything I write, please know that I’m praying through it before I publish.  I want to speak good, grace-filled words.  I want to encourage.  I want us to all search the scriptures to the glory of God.

On a side note, I’ve been called legalistic for my views; please read this before you call me legalistic.  Thank you.  :)