A Wise Woman Manages Her Time

(Me with my precious six year old at her first piano recital-she’s growing up so fast)

I’m scared of losing my children.

I’m also scared of losing myself…and I’m not even sure who that “self” is.

Life has become a disillusionment to me and everyday that I just keep moving without stopping to get a hold of myself and my life, I’m one more day lost. And the days are going by in a blur.

I used to be a good mom. I used to try to be a good wife and homemaker. But something in the last year has changed and now I’m just tired and depressed. I need to come back.

I’m taking a month off of blogging so I can take an inventory of my life, my goals, my purpose. I want to be a wise woman, and a women with depth. Right now, I’m a shell of what I used to be…or who I hoped I’d become.

My plans for the month are to eat. I’m desperate to feast on the Word and let it fill me up again. I’ll also be digesting Tell Your Time, Blogger Behave, and Educating the WholeHearted Child. I need a plan for my life, and I intend to get on with it.

I love my babes, and I love my husband and I am so thankful for our home and the life God has given me. He is so good and so patient and so gentle. But life rushed or lost is no full life, and I need filled. I don’t want to regret my life and how I lived it. The time is now.

Thanks for reading.

“How we live our days, of course, is how we live our lives.” -Annie Dillard

69 Coffee Talks on “A Wise Woman Manages Her Time”

  1. Christin says:

    (((Hugs Hugs Hugs))) friend

  2. Allison says:

    Good for you. Will be praying that your time will be fruitful, that the Lord will open your eyes and your heart to all that is around you filling you up in only ways He can. Be still and know that He is God….

  3. Karen says:

    I am exactly where you are! I have 6 littles that I am neglecting not to mention my time sitting at the Lord's feet. I have been mulling over some things that are distractions from the main thing(s) in my life and day and it is time to prioritize. Thankyou so much for encouraging me in the right direction. I'm joining you on this. I want to be more like my lord and love my littles with His strength.

  4. My precious sister in Christ, I will continue to pray fervently as you sit at the feet of Jesus and allow Him to fill you up to overflowing with His Holy Spirit spilling on those around you. Like you I have to remember what He told Martha, "..you are worried and bothered about so many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her." Luke 10:41-42 I am encouraged by your obedience to stop and do the one thing that is needed and 'it will not be taken away' from you.

    You have been doing many things and you are wise to rest just as Jesus told the disciples in Mark 6:30-32 I am on my knees for you and the ministry He has entrusted you…go feast on His Word beautiful one, I pray He reveals Himself and grows you in grace and knowledge.

  5. Wendy Hagen says:

    Celebration of Discipline has been awesome for me lately. Stopped social media for a month as I delved into it. Went through it with our college group and now will be leading the women through it at my church. Only requirement – a longing for God and to be deeper in relationship with Him. You probably have your books, study, lined up . . . but if not – it's a good one. And adequate sleep, that's a good one too.
    Prayers for you and your family and you navigate through this time.

  6. moretobe says:

    I'll be praying for you while you're gone, as I know that place well and need to walk carefully to keep the balance.

    Anne Ortlund's, "Discipline of a Beautiful Woman" triology really helped me get perspective years ago and learn how to live intentionally, making my family a first priority. Her wisdom inspired my living intentionally worksheet, which I use every year to get my priorities in order with the Lord. I'm sharing them for the first time at http://www.moretobe.com, with the hope and prayers that other women will be blessed by the concreteness of living intentionally before the throne of God.

    Enjoy the stillness of being with God, Sara Mae. It will be precious time!

    By His Grace,

  7. Lyli says:

    Asking God to refresh you and fill you with His strength and wisdom.

  8. Will be praying for you friend! You are wise to take a step back and take a break. It has always been helpful for me and I don't even have the many responsibilities/pressures that you have. I know the Lord will bless you and give you clear direction as you take this time. HUGS!!! Happy New Year to you and your sweet family! :)

  9. Heathahlee says:

    I"m kind of in the same spot right now…I haven't posted since December the 8th. And I realized to day as I commented on Emily's post that I've lost something of myself, too. It hasn't happened over the course of the last year…it's been slowly happening over several years. I don't like who I've become and I'm desperate to hear from my Creator. Praying for you as well as myself.

  10. Audry Cece says:

    GIRL! Thank you so much for sharing. You just expressed the heart of what so many of us Moms feel so much of the time. GOOD FOR YOU for taking time away to focus on your spiritual well being and your family.

    And thanks so much again for your honesty- we need more blogs like this!!

  11. Rebecca says:

    Oh, how we'll miss you!
    I hit the same point about 5 years ago, and it was horrible. Ultimately, during a few days away alone at a cabin on a solitary lake, the Lord graciously met me and taught me the lesson that my love for Him (and my church and my family) was a very shallow source that would constantly run dry or muddy. His love for me (and them) on the other hand, was fresh & limitless. Learning to tap into His vast love instead of relying on my own was a process that took almost a year, but it changed my life. I will be praying that you get time truly alone to meet God and that whatever lesson He has for you is as life-changing as mine was for me!

  12. number17 says:

    with you. wholeheartedly.

  13. Rachel says:

    love this- love your heart and love your blog. I know you will find great fulfillment as you continue to seek the Lord. You are a blessing!

  14. Diane says:

    Praying dear ~♥~

  15. KristineMac says:

    Bless your heart, Sarah Mae. I think every woman has been in your position at one time or other (maybe more than once). I'm praying God's peace fill you as you find yourself once again.

  16. Holly says:

    Thanks for admitting it. It’s okay to admit that we can’t do it all, and I respect you even more for your honesty. :) You are such a sweet blessing, praying God will use this time and surrender to mold and shape you into an even more beautiful child of His.

  17. Ashley Ditto says:

    I love your blog! It's so inspirational!

  18. I just read this post! I'm a little behind, apparently. It touched my heart b/c I can so empathize with you! I have that fear of "losing it or losing my children". It's a huge responsibility we carry, although a wonderful blessing, I know. It's just hard being a wife and mommy!
    Your blog is an inspiration! Thank you for sharing your heart. I am praying for peace and renewed strength!

  19. Jessica B says:

    You are not alone. I'm right there with you right now Sarah. I feel like everything is spiraling downwards this past year. I don't know who I am anymore, like you said, I seem to be a shell of my old self. So please know that you are not alone in this. Not that other people have or will go through the same thing as you, but others ARE going through the same thing right now. Anything you find that helps you through this hard time, please share it, or if you just need to share your thoughts please don't hesitate, I'm there too.

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    I'm Sarah Mae. I'm figuring out how to fit perfect into fallen skin. Stick around for the stretching...your soul is welcome here.

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