The Girl You Don’t Let Your Children Play With

“Go ahead, I dare you.”

Like venom, those words struck poison right in my heart. I held the razor blade, inched deeper into the luke warm water, and sobbed. I couldn’t do it. I lost the dare.

She dared me to plunge those razors into my wrist after I threatened I could. My whole teenage spirit hurt desperately; I only wanted her to stop me, to plead for my life, to tell me I was worth more, to show me she loved me. But she was far too smart for me. She knew I wouldn’t do it. Mother’s know these things, don’t you know?

Read the rest on (in)courage today.

___

Would you like to get this blog to your inbox or reader?

19 Coffee Talks on “The Girl You Don’t Let Your Children Play With”

  1. martzian says:

    Hi Sarah,

    I was really impressed with your story. Please let me know if I am getting the permission to translate it and share with my Romanian readers (I am writing on a few blogs).

    Blessings and thank you for sharing your precious experience, encouraging me.

  2. linda says:

    It was like looking at myself…but God had a plan for my life and when I had my beautiful girl child at eighteen he brought the most wonderful man into my life who loved her and me..gave that baby his name and married me.We went on to have 2 other beautiful daughters and he continued to love and care for us through thick and tin..perfect absolutely not but I always knew he loved us with ever atom of his soul! We Lost him in November after 44 years and the hole will never close for the family he left behind..He was Daddy to his own children and daddy to his Grandchildren when theirs left…he also was Pops to many boys and girls who came into our lives..we helped raise 3 other girls and our house was full of others..God had heard this girls prayer ..Please God let someone Love me and my baby..and 2 days later there he was..we were married 3 weeks later..God is so Good and I thank him for all his blessings..One day I will be able to give back to another girl what was given to me…LOVE!

    • Sarah Mae says:

      Wow. Thank you for sharing this beautiful, grace soaked story!

  3. nikki says:

    Beautiful story of redemption and God's amazing grace. Thank you for sharing your heart! I found you in incourage today.

  4. nikki says:

    Beautiful story of redemption and God's amazing grace. Thank you for sharing your heart! I found you in incourage today.

  5. Theresa says:

    Thanks for sharing your painful past. We have a lot in common and I can totally relate to your post. Praise God He pulled me out of the mire at age 23. Only He could do such a dramatic turn around in my life. Praising Him with you,
    ~Theresa

  6. lea says:

    wow. this story is a little stunning and terrifying.
    if you're saying that your mother was wise enough
    to call your bluff, then i certainly applaud her, and
    am elated to have YOU here to be such a sweet
    encouragement.

    unfortunately, i know too many children who took
    that bluff. how heartbreaking it must be to be
    their mother.

    you have me spinning off to prayer now.

    • Sarah Mae says:

      Lea, she wasn't wise at all. She was sad and lost and venomous. God has redeemed her as well.

  7. Emily says:

    Sarah Mae,
    Thank you for being truthful and candid about your very painful past. Although specific details are not the same, I was that girl too, that very same girl and God Almighty , by His grace, delivered me, too.
    When did you come to peace with speaking about your past? Even though I am a new creation in Christ, who I was 20 yrs ago still seems so painful to me.
    God is so good, so very good.

    • Sarah Mae says:

      Emily, I don't think I really ever had peace about it so much as I was faithful when God asked me to speak. There are things I don't share, but I'm trying to be open to what God does want me to use as a testimony to His grace faithfulness.

      It also helped to deal with some lies I had been believing. ;)

      • Emily says:

        I do understand , thank you for your willingness to share.
        There are many hurting young girls out there looking for love.
        Your story was a good reminder that we are so broken without Christ.

  8. courtney says:

    Thank you for sharing your story. I plan on pointing several friends your way when they are ready!

  9. Courtney says:

    Wow. I just read your post on (in)courage and had to come comment and say thank you. Thank you for giving me a jolt – I needed it. I'm so glad that your story has turned out the way it has, and that you are sharing it. What a beautiful testimony. Thank you.

  10. Karen p says:

    I AM THRILLED AND SO ANXIOUS TO SHARE THE DIRT SECRETS which
    satan wants to grow in the dark—His manure tries to kill steal and destroy
    GOD SAYS" DEVIL YOU ARE INDEED A MURDERER ,BUT I WILL USE YOU FOR
    MY PURPOSE…I WILL AND MUST USE YOU AS MY TOOLS, BUT NOT BEYOND THE BOUNDS THAT I SET!!!…..IT WILL NOT RUIN MY VINE BUT WILL HELP AND IMPROVE IT…
    YOU SHALL USE ONLY ENOUGH TO MAKE IT STURDY AND LUSH" Martin Luther

    Ive come from a similar story
    my girlfriends daughters and girlfriends have

  11. Thanks for sharing, it's a great reminder for me as a high school teacher to really reach out more to some of those girls I see struggling! And I do see lots of them! I bet your hubs does too!

  12. Wow! What a great post! I am so glad you shared your story. I work with youth at my church and pray that I never forget to see the girls in my midst with the eyes of Jesus. After all, we just never know who is in need of God's grace What a beautiful reminder this is to issue grace…always…unconditionally. Thanks for sharing and God bless!

  13. jenny white says:

    Thank you for sharing this. I also read your abortion story. I volunteer at a crisis pregnancy center. Stories like these bring me to tears and teach me about the girls I am ministering to. I am working with a girl right now who has such a hard life, wants nothing to do with Jesus, but is so wanting to be loved. She has been rejected again and again. I pray that He who is LOVE would melt her wounded heart.

  14. Natasha says:

    Wow that must have been heartbreaking. my moms words broke me as a child and at times as an adult they still do. i am enough for God even if i am never enough for her. thanks for reminding me of how far God had brought me.

Leave a Coffee Talk

CommentLuv badge

  • Photobucket

    I'm Sarah Mae. I'm figuring out how to fit perfect into fallen skin. Stick around for the stretching...your soul is welcome here.

  • Meta


  • Loading