Lady of Wisdom Interview – My Mother-in-Law

Today’s Lady of Wisdom interview is with my Mother-in-Law, Susan, who is such a gracious, humble, lovely, godly woman who inspires me to persevere in my role as a woman, wife, and mother.  She may or may not have threatened to tackle me at one point in our relationship when I was just dating her son {ahem}.

SM: Why did you choose to be a stay-at-home mom?

Susan: My plan when Gary and I married was that I would continue to work when I had children, however, after I became a believer I was deeply convicted about staying at home with the children; I felt like someone had to be home taking care of them. I knew, even when I was a very young woman, that those little souls were the most important thing to me.  There is only so much time to invest into their lives, and I didn’t want to miss that.  It is not quality time but the quantity of time that we have with them.  I did do other things and use the giftings God gave me, such as counseling, teaching Sunday school, leading bible studies, and volunteering, but my main priority was my home.   It wasn’t perfect, and there was heartache, frustration, and even times of feeling inadequate. What kept me going was that I knew instinctively and from God’s Word were I should be.

SM: What kinds of things did you do to train your children in the Lord?

Susan: Both Gary and I felt very strongly about Deuteronomy 6, so our faith was an everyday, intentional occurrence. We also tried to teach our children about serving others by having them with us when we served.  We were consistent in church and being joined with other believers. We were intentional about sharing the gospel, and intentional about saying, “I’m sorry, I was wrong.” We also taught them to show grace towards others.  Another very important thing Gary and I did was we developed our own relationship with God through bible reading, study, memorization, and developing our marriage relationship. Developing the marriage relationship is so very important, not just for you and your husband, but because of the huge affect it has as on your children.

SM: What are some “tools” in your tool kit of parenting that have worked for you that you could pass on to younger moms?

  • Schedules – Children need schedules/routine; they get security from it, discipline, and they are even happier.
  • Curbing what you invite into your home – T.V., we weren’t into whatever was popular out there, we tried to bring in wholesome things into our lives.  Hold the line on things, even when you get a hard time.
  • Share about purity in mind, heart, and body –hold the line with that as well. We taught our daughters that you can be attractive and beautiful without showing a lot.  It’s also very important that a father doesn’t put is daughters down or make them feel impure.
  • Talk about sexual things with them in light of God’s Word
  • Be most concerned for their salvation

SM: What would you do over if you could?

Susan: The biggest thing I wish I could do is having had a better handle on my emotions, my anger… I wish I could have curbed my temper more – I was harsh at times.  I went back and said I’m sorry, and prayed a lot about it, but I just lost it at times.  I hated that.

SM: Any advice for stay-at-home moms who feel like they’ve lost themselves as women or are just exhaused?

Susan: The things that kept me going and that I recommend are: a supportive husband, dates with your husband so you can be a wife (not just a mother), and stay in the Word (powerful) – God’s Word is what will help you to persevere.  I also think it is healthy to take time on your own as a refreshment (not as an escape).

SM: How did you make time for your husband when you were exhausted with little ones?

Susan:  I would take a nap.  I took power naps (even 20 minutes) and that would refresh me enough to have energy for my husband.  Also, I would set my mind on him. I purposefully made myself look nice – you have to be intentional or it doesn’t happen. You’re always going to be tired, but you have to take time to rest.

SM: What is the greatest thing you’ve learned in how to be a good wife?

Susan: The greatest thing I’ve learned is realizing the grace God has given me and being able to turn around and show grace towards my husband. Whatever I’ve accused him of, guess whose done it too?  Me.

Today’s post is linked up with the first ever Polished Cornerstones link-up on RaisingHomemakers.com.

Read more Lady of Wisdom interviews here.

19 Coffee Talks on “Lady of Wisdom Interview – My Mother-in-Law”

  1. Debbie says:

    LOVE. HER. WISDOM. And appreciate what she said about anger. Bless her heart!

  2. Lisa Grace says:

    Wonderful! What a great Titus 2 moment; there is something precious about 'sitting at the feet of' a woman who has been where I am and hearing her godly advice. And it was also on time for my life. I love how God seems to move in waves across many lives and spheres of influence!

  3. Tiffany says:

    This was such an encouragement to read, and what a blessing for you, I'm sure. I really appreciated what she said about anger – wow. Thanks, Sarah Mae.

  4. Julia says:

    What great wisdom. You are so blessed to have a godly mother-in-law, as I do. I love hearing from older women, so I'm glad this will be a series for you.

  5. Nikki says:

    You are truly blessed to have a mother-in-law like that:)

  6. Great interview! We should all have women like that in our lives to mentor us.

  7. Sarah says:

    What wonderful and practical advice! Awesome!

  8. Tiffany says:

    I can relate in regards to anger! This is an issue for me and it is a DAILY process to be controlled by the Spirit and not by my emotions. I loved reading this. It was a huge encouragement to me.

  9. Lovely interview :) Your very blessed to have such a wise woman in your life.

  10. Tracey says:

    What a blessing to have a Godly woman from whom you can learn! Thanks for sharing her wisdom with us.

  11. Traci says:

    WONDERFUL ADVICE!!!! You have a wise mother-in-law!

  12. ginny says:

    wow. i so needed to read this today. i am at the end of a very frazzled rope and suffering from a mild post-partum depression… a lot of what your MIL shared spoke directly to me. praise God that there are women like her to mentor me (even though i don't even know her!). please thank her for me. and thank you for asking her such thoughtful questions. i am glad to know that i am not the only one with a short fuse… it seems like i never get a hold on it for very long.

  13. Renee says:

    Love you, Mom! It's wonderful to read this and even more wonderful to know that I was one of the recipients…thank you for all you gave at great cost to yourself. I'm reaping the benefits!

  14. I enjoyed this "interview" a lot. Thanks for sharing it with all of us. When things pull tight the thing I wish I too had was self-control as it covers so many gamets of my life. *smile* My speach, sharing my understanding of what schricpure says, frusteration, etc. So, I don't just strive for patience rather I strive for self-control and hope the fruit is seen clearly by our two little ones daily. Growing all the time in my Lord and Saviro. Sincerely, Mommy of two little blessings & so much more!

  15. Michelle says:

    This is so wonderful! I just love it and wish so much that my mother-in-love was still alive so I could interview her.

    I could have written this post…right down to the part about losing control of my emotions. I wish God would just zap all anger out of me.

    Thanks you for sharing.

    Blessings,

    Michelle

  16. Christi says:

    What a beautiful woman…both inside and out!! Wow!! You are so blessed to have her as a Mother-in-Law!!

  17. Its always refreshing to "hear" (or read ;) the advice/experience of another godly mother. Mid June a group of 11 of us women mostly from my church (but not all) got together to hear from one or two women who have already raised sons through high school ( and one into marriage and fatherhood). It was a Titus 2 type of get-together. I'm planning another one for the ladies who didn't get to come to that one. {One of our pastor's wives and another godly mom who serves in our church are the ones who shared}- I just organize/invite.

  18. Stacie says:

    Loved her honesty. A great interview.

  19. Karen says:

    Thanks, Susan, for admitting your problem with anger and having been harsh. I sturggled with that, too, in my marriage and parenting. You're right, grace is powerful agent for good and healing in marriage and all relationships.
    Karen´s last [type] ..Today
    Karen´s last [type] ..Today

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