How Do I Teach Obedience? Child Training Links
December 7th, 2009
(Custom sign from Danielson Designs Studio)
I have been very intentional this week on teaching my children obedience, and it has been a tough but fruitful week. I am so thankful to have a God that knows I (and my children) am going to fail, and that ultimately my children are in His hands – so I pray that when I fail, they will run to Him.
We must remember that when our children disobey, they are just doing what they know to do – they are sinners! It is our job to “civilize” them. I also realize that in order to effectively train your children, you must be with them. I strongly, with a sincere heart, encourage you to do whatever you can to be home with your children in order to train them up to be the people who may very well lead nations.
With all that said, I have listed some of the resources that have best helped me in teaching my children obedience, especially first-time obedience. I do not necessarily agree or adhere to everything on these websites (nor have I read each and every word on them), but there are still some great applications – as always, use wisdom.
(Let’s also try to let our babes see more smiles on our face then that “hard” angry one that afflicts many moms, myself included.)
Child Training Resources
Raising Godly Tomatoes (This whole website is filled with very practical “how-to” obedience advice.)
Excerpt: Teaching obedience so you don’t have to teach anything else….Love, nurture, encourage and educate them constantly. Teach them who God is and what His ways are like. When they disobey, or display a bad attitude, or do anything a godly child would not do, correct them promptly and require them to repeat what they did in godly manner. Once they have obeyed you with at pleasant attitude (never proceed until they do), go back to loving, nurturing, teaching, mentoring, apprenticing and enjoying your children as you were before. Watch your children.
Achieving First-Time Obedience
Excerpt: One of the most important things you need to require of yourself is consistency. If you want first-time obedience from your child, you must be 100% consistent. If you slip, he will too. But if you require it, he will meet your expectation. Your child will only rise to the expectation you set for him. Set the bar high but keep in mind you need to do the work to help him get there.
Gentle Reminders to Children When Habit Training
Excerpt: I think a seven year old often needs gentle reminders. However, there sometimes comes a point when Mom needs to assess the situation (applying wisdom) and determine if the child has slipped into a bad habit.
Excerpt: To a child a little older, “Honey, you are forgetting that your emotions are not the boss of yourself, YOU are. You must control them. When you feel angry, do not let it overcome you. The Lord says that an angry person is like a castle with no walls around it to protect it. You don’t want the enemy to win or you will regret it later. You want to be a happy person.”
Covers…
- Bribing Children
- Children Biting
- Children and Fears
- Educational Component of Correction
- Parenting Your Child’s Emotions
- Proper Use of Rewards
- Spanking
- Sibling Conflict How to Prevent It.
- Temper Tantrums
- Whining
Excerpt: Much of the reason I feel so deeply about this is my own burden for how our culture has lost the fear of the Lord. My three year old has a decent grasp on theology for a preschooler, but there is much that she is simply unable to comprehend because of age and cognitive development. She can’t really understand the concept of fearing God, but she can understand the concept of fearing her parents!
Let’s get specific – for the spanker’s and the non-spankers:
Discipline: Loving Use of the Rod (For those who spank)
The Mystery of Discipline (For those who don’t spank, but can also be used for those who do!)
Related articles from Like a Warm Cup of Coffee:
Blessings or Burdens? Dealing with Disobedience
Whining & Complaining – Sinning With Your Mouth (Correcting A Whining Kiddo)
Other Resources
Raising Godly Children (4 DVD’s) – I just ordered this, so I’ll let you know how it is after I watch it!
Whew! Hope this helpful!
Oh, and don’t forget to link-up here if you have donated to Samaritan’s Purse!
After a VERY rough day with my 2 year old, lots of prayer and a few tears from a pregnant me… this post is exactly what I needed. Great resources. Thank you.
This is such an important topic. I think one important feature of teaching and disciplining children is to remember we “disciple” them as well. We are their best example of good and proper, “civilized” behavior. Great blog :)
Kristine McGuire´s last blog post … Can Christians Be Psychic?
Thanks for the great resources! I love Raising Godly Tomatoes!! Great resource!
Christin´s last blog post … Educating the Whole Hearted Child, by Clay and Sally Clarkson
Oh I love this, I need a good refresher course and have this post bookmarked to read, and read, and read… ;-) Thanks for linking up these great resources!
Carisa
Carisa´s last blog post … Tot School ~ CHRISTmas Fun!
Sarah Mae, you hit the nail on the head. You’ve been INTENTIONAL … that has been my theme for about a year in my own devotional life, and a couple of months ago God challenged me to expand that intention into my family. I have been working on becoming an intentional wife (I’m blogging on my 4 week journey to becoming a better helpmeet now!) and on becoming an intentional mom. The difference in my kid’s lives has been amazing! God is a God who intentionally loves us, intentionally sacrificed for us, intentionally created us. We are created in His image and need be no less intentional than He.
Lisa Grace´s last blog post … Thanksgiving Day (Yup, Dec. 7th)
Thank you for these great resources! I saved them for future use :).
Stephanie´s last blog post … A Continual Dripping of Rain or A Crown
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Thanks for all these wonderful links/resources. I will be sure to check them out!
Hugs,
Traci
Traci´s last blog post … 3 LESS and 3 MORE – Striving To Make Some Healthy Changes
Good for you for posting this reminder to all moms. The resources are great, and needed. We disciplined our kids when they were younger, and let me tell you there were days when I thought I could not muster the energy to continue to discipline. But I am glad I did, I now see the fruit of my labor with my tweens/teens! They are not perfect, but they understand No means No, and the fact their are consequences to your actions! :)
Sandy @ Jesus and Dark Chocolate´s last blog post … It’s a tradition, It’s a legend, It’s FUN!
Though not necessarily just about obedience but on the larger subject of children training, I just absolutely LOVE Tedd Tripp’s “Shepherding a Child’s Heart” and “Instructing a Child’s Heart”. Both are AMAZING reads, eye-openers and very convicting for my own life in relationship to God!
I LOVE the Raising Godly Tomatoes site and have followed their message boards for years!!!
I posted a blog on fun method to train first time obedience here:
http://womenlivingwell-courtney.blogspot.com/2009/05/parenting-how-to-get-first-time.html
If you like the idea and want to repost it you are welcome to!
Courtney
Courtney (Women Living Well)´s last blog post … Tasty Tuesday: Easy Microwave Peanut Brittle
Oh thank you thank you thank you!
Just the thing I needed in just the nick of time!
I’m off to dry my eyeballs out with all the reading.
Thanks for the practical advice.
EM´s last blog post … I’m so sorry
Thanks for this resourceful post! I can’t wait to read through all the links!
wow! what a great post full of SO many resources! When will I find the time to read it all? Thanks for your commitment to biblical truth! Going to do a little browsing through all these great links now!
Mama Llama´s last blog post … Cookie Exchange!
Great links, Sarah Mae!
The DVD series from the Bradricks is wonderful. I don’t agree with everything they say but the majority is spot on.
Kelly @ Wisdom Begun´s last blog post … Menu Plan Monday
I can’t thank you enough for these links. I am just now sitting down and going through my reader…and this is a subject I have been praying over today. I think my exact prayer was “Lord, help me with these kids, they are driving me crazy!”
I think my prayer has been answered. At least I have guidance now! Thank you so much.
Lynsey´s last blog post … Merry SITSmas!!
Thanks for the links! We are really in need of a crash course on obedience right now.
I listened to Raising Godly Children from the Bradrick’s about 25 years ago and it completely changed our family! What a blessing to have this materal available…and how I enjoyed our little ones once we realized what the basics of child rearing were. I have had the privledge of friendship with this family for many years…they are genuine, joy-filled believers with so much wisdom to share. Now, as my own children are having their little ones, what a joy to see each of them discipling and training the next generation.
“Whining & Complaining” is my heavy burden of teaching obedience with my 4 yr old. THank you for the resources, Sarah! You might get a chuckle out of my post today, coincidently on my attempt to Advent with my son. I am learning that God will bless me in my messes (even in learning to train my child).. Thank God! .. And thank you for being in it and sharing your thoughts on this. Parenting is SO hard, but people rarely openly share that.
Bonnie Gray | FaithBarista´s last blog post … The Blessing of a Bungling Advent
What great information..
Lucy´s last blog post … Cancer Prevention, Anti-clotting, Just a Few of the Green Tea Benefits
This is most certainly an answer to a prayer from this morning. Amazing how God works. Thank you so much!
JenniferG´s last blog post … Why I Never Make It To The Cookies. Ever.
great list! i’ll have to check some of those out!
I’m a foster mom of two little girls who are in desperate need of some serious training and discipline, but our hands are so tied in what we can and can’t do. So frustrating! Thanks for your post. I will look into these resources.
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